TWO ROADS

Although I have a bunch of stories I've pre-written and ready to go, I thought I'd take the time this week to insert just a little thought provoking thing, and have you explore your life a bit.

Have you ever wondered where all the time has gone? I turned 42 last month. Next year this time I'll have been out of high school for 25 years and it'll be 21 years since I took a leave of absence from UCSB to run the family business (liquor store, and yes I'm Korean :), partially to be the dutiful son who was willing to sacrifice for the family when my mother was diagnosed with cancer and partly because I really didn't like school. Although, I did love my four-day weekends. I managed to schedule all of my classes on Tuesday and Thursday so I could have Friday, Saturday, Sunday and Monday off. Only if I had studied on those days rather than drink, drink and drink some more. And I don't mean water, you know what I mean?

It's fun to reminisce a bit, and I'm certainly fortunate that I'm still alive to even think about my past from time to time. It's amazing when I think about what I was like and what was so important to me back then, compared to who I've become so far and what's important to me now. I can honestly tell you that my life is nothing like what I thought it would be...I don't know that I had the capacity to see this future when I was twenty. Who knew back then I'd have spoken to and facilitated workshops and seminars in front of thousands of people? I didn't see that one coming. I was the kid who wet his pants in front of his fourth grade class. Who knew? What am I saying? Well you never know how someone's life will turn out. Life is certainly not about how you start, neither is it about how things may be now. It's really about becoming, isn't it? So the question is who are you becoming? and is that who you want to become or are you allowing the circumstances of your life dictate to you who you should become? Every choice we make in life either creates more opportunities or shuts down opportunities, don't they?

Why not go for the big things in life? The really risky and scary ones that you know you want, but for whatever reason you've held back on. Not even so much to get the thing done, but to challenge yourself and see what you're really made of. Going back to the speaking thing for me, I'm certain everyone has their opinions about my capacity as a public speaker, but the thing is that decision for me was quite scary and risky and it has certainly supported me in becoming the man that I am today. Not because I'm so great, but mainly because I took the scarier route rather than the one I already knew and was comfortable with. Making a decision like that has helped me to become the husband, the father, the businessman, the friend, mentor and all of the other things that I am today. The great thing is exercising those risk-taking muscles has it be easier for me to make those decisions moving in to the future, and that capacity will shape the man that I am becoming. As Robert Frost once wrote:

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth.

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same.

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how WAY LEADS ON TO WAY,(I love this)
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I--
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

May we all be bold enough to at least consider the road less traveled, and may some of us exercise enough courage to actually travel that road. Mostly, may I continue to practice what I preach. God bless, until next time...

Live FREE!