Giving starts when...

you decide that you're committed to being a giver.

I know that this is contrary to how I was raised. I was told things like, "how can you give when you don't have enough for your self, that's stupid. Make a lot and then when you have more than enough for your self, then you can give." Have you ever noticed that whenever you say things like "I just need $500 more a month, then I'll be fine." Then you get that $500 more a month and it's still not fine? How's that possible? Then you think just $500 more, then that day comes and it's still not enough. What if that day never comes? Here's a different question: What if that day will never come because the thought process of lack will never allow you to see that you already have more than enough?

You can wait for the day whenever this arbitrary amount called "enough" shows up on your door step, or you can simply purpose yourself to be a giver because you choose abundance.

Either way you'll be right. The question is what is the residual effect you want to have in this world. Do you want to be about lack and scarcity and what that creates or do you want to be about prosperity and abundance and what that creates?

Until next time...

Live FREE!

So what does it take...really?

What's in the way of you accomplishing what you want?

Lack of money? Perhaps. Not enough time in a day? Too many things on your plate? How about not enough education or the right upbringing? What about...it's just not meant for people like you? or It's just not the right time, the timing is not good right now? Maybe you're just waiting for things to be just right, you're one of these "as long as" or "when this happens...then I will..." people.

Most people when posed with this question will inevitably name some set of circumstances and situations as to why they haven't accomplished what they want or haven't started on what they want. Let me ask you, what if that wasn't it? Really? What if all of the reasons and excuses you keep making weren't the real issue? I know, in your mind those things really seem like the reasons why not to, but just consider the question. What if that's just your mind playing tricks on you? What if your mind was so powerful that it can come up with these great stories to cover up what's really stopping you? What might the stories be covering up? What if the stories were just stories, and you could author new ones?

Until next time...

Live FREE!

Change and Rescue

"Most people hate change so much that they're willing to lose. We hated losing so much that we were willing to change."

Change. It seems to me that most people get to a point in their life that they resist change so much that they end up losing in big ways rather than simply changing. What is this all about?

I was at a seminar not too long ago, and the people who were talking made what I would consider some profound observations, one of which is noted above. The second thing that I found to be quite profound I will share with you at the end. Before I do let's consider a few things.

How often do we sit around and wait for the solution, or someone simply hands us the solution and we don't even put it in to play? We get more caught up in figuring out why it won't work than just simply giving it a shot. It seems to me that at some point you've got to swim your drowning butt over to the lifesaver that was thrown your way, but most people are too busy complaining that it wasn't thrown close enough to them. I don't care if you need to lose weight, get a job, make your first million dollars...if you want things to change then you've got to change! I don't mean to come down on anyone, I believe people have tremendous potential and that you can accomplish all kinds of amazing things. After all the same human genious that figured out how to get a man to the moon and back resides in all of us, but the truth is that the you that is going to have your dreams come true probably isn't the you that's currently reading this. If it was, you'd already have it accomplished. Somehow you've got to unleash this locked-up potential! I think one of the worst compliments some one could give you is, "You have tremendous potential." It means they see something bigger in you and you haven't lived up to it. So, I've got to tell you, "You have tremendous potential!"

So what was this profound thing? Here it is, and seriously consider: "Are you willing to participate in your own rescue?"

Until next time...

Live FREE!

The difference

I was at a large retailer the other day and was grinding my coffee at the coffee grinder. Once I was done grinding the coffee I needed to seal the bag back up. The retailer provided a roll of clear packaging tape and scissors to accomodate this procedure. Have you ever noticed how difficult it is to find that spot where the tape roll begins on one of those rolls of clear packing tape? Well after fumbling with it for a bit I finally found it, stretched out a piece of tape long enough to tape the bag shut, cut it off, sealed up the bag, and then took two seconds to fold over the tape so that the next person wouldn't have to fumble with the tape as I had done. Did that make a difference with the next person?

I then was in the parking lot pulling out when I noticed a woman push her cart in to an empty parking space just two spaces away from where her car was parked. Have you ever had the experience of seeing an open parking space, went to pull in just to find out that someone had left a shopping cart in that space and you're left with the choice of getting out and moving the cart or finding another space? I also noticed that to the other side of her car just five spaces away was the area specifically designed for the shopping carts to be put in to. Did this make a difference with the next person?

So how does someone make a difference? Consider that you are always making a difference, the question is what is the difference you're making? Until next time...

Live FREE!

An excerpt from my upcoming book "The Undustrial Revolution!"

The system of education as it exists currently, by design or by accident, seems to strip away a child’s natural desire to learn. By the time children are indoctrinated in to this environment they no longer have a desire to learn, but rather the game becomes how can I do the least amount of work possible to get the best grades possible so I can get by. Even the ones who do their best, the game is about getting good grades, and not necessarily to learn and to grow. By the time these children grow up and become adults they take this level of thinking in to the work force. They do the least amount of work possible for the biggest possible paycheck, or do their best for a paycheck. There is no pride of work, desire to grow and expand their capacities. The typical employee gives the least of their efforts and talents for the purpose of collecting the biggest possible check. The typical employer gives the smallest check possible for the purpose of getting the most amount of work. This is not a win/win environment where people are driven by vision and purpose, but a lose/lose environment where the driving force is surviving, getting by. Everyone is simply up to collecting a paycheck. It’s such a normal experience that, even as you read these words, you are more than likely saying to yourself, “Yeah, and so what?”

What do you do?

It's interesting...I met quite a few people over the weekend at an expo. It's always interesting to me during these interactions how people react when asked the simplest of questions. Well...consider the following question and answer it out loud as you're reading this, okay? What do you do?

Did you answer it out loud like I asked? If you did we'll get to it in just a minute here. If you did not, how come? What did you tell yourself that kept you from answering that question? Just play along, okay?

Now...if you did answer it out loud did you state your job title? I was amazed how many people gave me their job title when I asked them what it is that they did. Either that or gave me something that sounded rehearsed and completely canned. One guy gave me his job title, and when I asked him "What exactly does that mean?" He fumbled about for words. I'm convinced still that this guy doesn't really know what he actually does for work!

It's amazing how people throw around titles and I guess expect people to know what the job description is for that title. After all I know lots of parents, and if you were to ask all of these parents what they actually do I'm sure you'd get a bunch of different answers, wouldn't you? So the obvious question I will leave you with today is "What do you do?" Until next time...

Live FREE!

You can report the news or you can make the news!

Due to the life I have chosen, I get the amazing privilege of meeting hundreds of people from all walks of life. Whenever I get the chance to interact with these people whether it’s one-on-one or in observing them as they interact with others, I am amazed that most people speak about other people’s lives or when they talk about their lives they talk primarily about their past. One day it struck me that as we go through life we are always talking about something or someone or people are talking about us. That is you are either reporting the news or you are making the news.

Although there is nothing wrong with either one of these things, I believe that how much of a person's time gets invested in reporting the news will create certain outcomes in life just as investing time in making the news will create certain outcomes in life. Most people spend a lopsided amount of time talking about other people’s lives. They spend time talking about how so and so is getting divorced, which celebrities are dating, which are breaking up, how the economy is doing and what the experts are saying will happen moving in to the future. On another level they may not be talking about others, but they are involved in the game of rehashing old memories with “remember when…” stories of how things used to be or how they once did something. It's, unfortunately, quite rare to hear about what someone is up to in one's life, NOW!

So let me ask you...Are you reporting the news or making the news? Until next time...



Live FREE!

TWO ROADS

Although I have a bunch of stories I've pre-written and ready to go, I thought I'd take the time this week to insert just a little thought provoking thing, and have you explore your life a bit.

Have you ever wondered where all the time has gone? I turned 42 last month. Next year this time I'll have been out of high school for 25 years and it'll be 21 years since I took a leave of absence from UCSB to run the family business (liquor store, and yes I'm Korean :), partially to be the dutiful son who was willing to sacrifice for the family when my mother was diagnosed with cancer and partly because I really didn't like school. Although, I did love my four-day weekends. I managed to schedule all of my classes on Tuesday and Thursday so I could have Friday, Saturday, Sunday and Monday off. Only if I had studied on those days rather than drink, drink and drink some more. And I don't mean water, you know what I mean?

It's fun to reminisce a bit, and I'm certainly fortunate that I'm still alive to even think about my past from time to time. It's amazing when I think about what I was like and what was so important to me back then, compared to who I've become so far and what's important to me now. I can honestly tell you that my life is nothing like what I thought it would be...I don't know that I had the capacity to see this future when I was twenty. Who knew back then I'd have spoken to and facilitated workshops and seminars in front of thousands of people? I didn't see that one coming. I was the kid who wet his pants in front of his fourth grade class. Who knew? What am I saying? Well you never know how someone's life will turn out. Life is certainly not about how you start, neither is it about how things may be now. It's really about becoming, isn't it? So the question is who are you becoming? and is that who you want to become or are you allowing the circumstances of your life dictate to you who you should become? Every choice we make in life either creates more opportunities or shuts down opportunities, don't they?

Why not go for the big things in life? The really risky and scary ones that you know you want, but for whatever reason you've held back on. Not even so much to get the thing done, but to challenge yourself and see what you're really made of. Going back to the speaking thing for me, I'm certain everyone has their opinions about my capacity as a public speaker, but the thing is that decision for me was quite scary and risky and it has certainly supported me in becoming the man that I am today. Not because I'm so great, but mainly because I took the scarier route rather than the one I already knew and was comfortable with. Making a decision like that has helped me to become the husband, the father, the businessman, the friend, mentor and all of the other things that I am today. The great thing is exercising those risk-taking muscles has it be easier for me to make those decisions moving in to the future, and that capacity will shape the man that I am becoming. As Robert Frost once wrote:

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth.

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same.

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how WAY LEADS ON TO WAY,(I love this)
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I--
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

May we all be bold enough to at least consider the road less traveled, and may some of us exercise enough courage to actually travel that road. Mostly, may I continue to practice what I preach. God bless, until next time...

Live FREE!

I'm a SINNER?

What does it mean to sin? The word sin in Hebrew is chattath, and in Greek it is hamartia. Both these words mean 'to miss the mark.' They are words which illustrate that something is off target. Consider the illustration of aiming and missing the target like in archery. Now consider setting and missing your goal. I’d like you to consider that these two things to be the same. This would be to sin. What am I getting at? Well what if you were to tell someone that you were going to attend their party, and then for whatever reason you end up missing the party? Stay with me here, now. This would by definition be sin. Not because you lied. It’s not even a question of doing something bad or wrong. It’s simply you said one thing and did another. What about being late to a meeting? What about saying you’ll lose twenty pounds and not doing that? What about setting the alarm for 6:00am and hitting the snooze button? Any example will do. What have you come up with? Any time you say “X” and do “Y” this would be missing the mark, wouldn’t it? Would this be sin? It would.

I’m sure you can think of people in your life, right now, when they say they’ll do something you can almost bank on them not doing it. My question to you is really, what kind of person are you? Are you the kind of person who does what you say? Or are you the kind of person that may or may not do what you say? Take a moment and be honest with yourself. I’m sure you have great reasons why you don’t follow through, but regardless of your reasons just simply answer the question. I have no judgment about you if you’re not a person who follows through. This is simply an opportunity to be honest with yourself.

Now, when you find yourself not following through on what you say, what is it that you tell yourself to justify that behavior? How do you let yourself off the hook? Do you tell yourself everyone else is doing it therefore it’s ok? Do you tell yourself that the circumstances were beyond your control, therefore the circumstances allowed you or did not allow you to follow through? What do you say that makes it ok to not be your word?

Consider the possibility that you tell yourself these stories often. In fact it’s these stories that you keep telling yourself that are keeping you from achieving your dreams and goals. How’s that you ask? Think back to the last big goal you set and did not achieve. Heck, think back to any little thing you said you’d do that you did not follow through on. I’d bet money that you told yourself something that made it okay not to follow through on that, didn’t you? Please understand, again, that I have no judgment about this. I’m human. I do the same types of things. What I am getting at, however, is that to the degree that you do what you say you’re going to do, regardless of the circumstances, is to the degree that your life will work. And to the degree that you do not do what you say you’re going to do is to the degree that your life will not work. Let’s think about this, we all have circumstances, don’t we? How is it that some people come through more often than not and some people don’t come through faced with the most ridiculously smallest of circumstances. The truth is that when we’re about making excuses rather than getting the results, well, almost any excuse will do, won’t it? The dog ate my homework. The traffic. The kids. The wife. Stories piled on top of stories. I’d like you to think about this…let’s say at the end of your life you will either have all of the stories, reasons, justifications, rationalizations and excuses or you will have the life of your dreams, which would you rather have? Which is the legacy you’d like to leave for your loved ones? Which is the kind of person you’d like to be remembered as? If you were to be honest with yourself right now, based on how you’re living your life minus the stories, excuses, justifications and rationalizations how would you be remembered if you were to die right now?

Perhaps you’re saying to yourself, “Nobody's perfect.” I certainly understand that, and what if that was a story, excuse or rationalization. It’s really about this idea of being your word or not being your word, and what is the thinking beneath the surface that allows the behavior to come out the way it comes out? Is it that circumstances determine our behaviors or could it be something other than that? There are circumstances beyond our control, for sure, but are there circumstances within our control that we give in to and then rationalize, justify, excuse? Here's a challenge for you, do everything you say you're going to do for this week, as if there are no small promises. Everything is important, because what you say is important, because you're important. Until next time...


Live FREE!