Are you a bargain shopper?

When is a bargain not a bargain? Haven't you ever made a purchase because the price for the item was really attractive? Only to find out later that there was a reason why it was so inexpensive? or CHEAP!!! In this day and age when money is so tight for so many of us, it's both easy and tempting to look for bargains. It's also very easy and tempting to make purchases that seem like a great deal today, only to find out that it wasn't such a great deal after all. I mean think of all the ways that something, even though it doesn't cost as much up front ends up costing much more later. Look at the way people eat these days. Fast food is pretty much the norm for a vast majority of the people, why? Well it's cheap, first of all, it seems to save some money. How about time? Yeah, that's right up there isn't it since we're all so busy? It saves both time and money, what a deal, right? or does it? When you think of the health implications of eating fast food does it really make sense that you need to save money and time? What are the prices you end up paying in the long run for the short term payoffs of time and money. Was it worth the $3 savings for that heart attack? Is it really worth saving 15 minutes for that cancer? How about obesity and the onset of diabetes? At the beginning of the summer I bought a pair of shoes for $40. I noticed the other day that it was alread starting to fall apart. I started to get a bit upset, mumbling something about low-quality, they don't make things like they used to, blah-blah-blah, but then I thought to myself I got what I paid for. On the other hand I have three pairs of dress shoes that I purchased over nine years ago (in fact one of them I've had for 12 years). They each cost over $400, but besides the occasional shoe shine, they are all in great shape. Which was the better purchase? Which was truly the bargain?

Life is full of prices and payoffs isn't it? You may be able to get away with a payoff in the short term without paying a big price up front, but everything in life has a cost to it. And life has a way of balancing out the equation, eventually. Pay now or pay later? Most people would rather pay later, but that seems to me that's because most people don't have an understanding of how prices and payoffs work in conjunction with eachother. A mentor of mine used to always say you can pay your prices up front or you can pay later with penalties and interest.

Even geater than that, there are some things in life that require you to pay all of your prices up front and don't guarantee you anything? For example, I don't know of any Olympic athlete who shows up for the games, gets the gold medal for the promise of working out diligently for the next ten years. Not even Michael Phelps and he has a track record of sucess, deosn't he? It looks silly in print doesn't it, yet how many of us so often want the successes of life without paying the prices required for success up front? We negotiate with God, ourselves, and whoever else rather than just paying the price that success requires and demands from us. When and how did work become a dirty four letter word? Perhaps it has something to do with how little our society currently rewards it, but again probably a subject for some other time. In the mean time I'd like to leave you with a couple of thoughts:
1. Success demands three things and guarantess you nothing. Success demands that YOU pay a price, not someone else. Success demands that you pay your price in full. And success demands that you pay all of your prices up front!
2. The price paid for excellence will always be a bargain compared to the price paid for mediocrity.

Until next time...

Live FREE!


P.S. Do you have any questions that I can help you with? I'd be more than happy to entertain any questions you have and possibly even help you in creating solutions to some of your challenges. I'd love to hear from you, so feel free to send me an email to coachjang@gmail.com. Live FREE!!

Do things fall apart or do we help it along?

An interesting thing happened with my son, Payton, the other day. I have an old office chair and the arm-rests are falling apart on it. Certainly over time things do seem to deteriorate. Certainly it seems that way doesn't it. Haven't you seen a car that's been parked in the same spot over time just collect dust and dirt. You don't have to help it along it just goes about the cycle of decay and disorder. This had me think about life a bit, because even though the arm rests are falling apart how much of it was natural wear and tear and how much of it was helped along by my not taking care of it? How often in life do we simply assume this level of thinking and rather than working on preserving and growing things like relationships we simply give in to the natural process. One thing is for sure, I've seen many things grow over time, but it does requires diligence, commitment and just plain old work. Otherwise nature will take its course. Of course in the long run nature always wins, and yet we do have some say in the matter before the inevitalbe occurs don't we? Then there's the work of Ilya Prigogine, if you'd like to do some light reading on the matter...which I will not go in to here...today. Perhaps another time for that one.

The other thing that happened that I really want to focus on was the way my son Payton languaged what was happening and how that shaped his experience. Yes it is certainly a fact that based on sight the arm rests are falling apart, and it is also a fact that as my son was sitting in that chair he was helping the process along by picking at the foam material with his fingers. The interesting thing was that he stated "Dad, This thing's coming off." His tone of voice had, in my opinion, a level of frustration to it. I looked over at the situation and clearly saw that he was picking at the armrests and asked him, "Is it coming off or are you taking it off by picking at it?" To which he replied that he was in fact picking at the armrests. What was noticeable to me, was that his experience also seemed to change as he changed the way he talked about it. Again, let me reiterate that both perspectives were valid to the situation. However, depending on which perspective he chose and the resulting languaging of the situation his experience seemed to change.

Could it be that simple? What if our experience in life has little to do with what is happening and much more to do with our prespective and how we voacalize those events? Let's say that your significant other decides to call it quits and leave you, are there not many perspectives to this event? Does it necessarily mean that it's the end of the world? Is it a fact that you must be devastated? Isn't it possible to assess the situation and not just say it, but really mean it and own it that this is a liberating event and now you have the opportunity to meet someone who really cares about you and loves you for who you are? Or any number of interpretations that are availalble to us in our imaginations? What about the current state of the economy? How could this time in the economy be a great thing? Just got laid off? Again, how could that event be the best event of your life up until now? I'm not talking about being optimistic. I'm talking about choosing a perspective that empowers you to create new solutions, take new actions! So how important are the words that we choose, and what if we really do color our experiences by the words we choose, especially the ones that we put a great deal of emotion behind as we say them? If your experience is one of misery, what if you were the one creating that for yourself by telling yourself all the time how miserable your situation is? And how could that be great news for you if that's the way it is? Well, I get that there is a level of responsibility involved here, but we'll touch on that some other time. In the mean time don't just have a great day have an amazingly fantastic day! (and say it like you mean it! :) Until next time...

Live FREE!

Whose job is it to learn?

I've attended many, many seminars in my life on everything from how to make money in real estate to personal development. I love seminars and workshops, and I'm sure I'll continue to attend them until the day I die. I always leave these events with an experience of joy and aliveness. Although I receive great information when I attend, I realize that it is only when I apply the information that I create great positive impact in my life from increasing my income to reducing taxes to being a better father, leader, friend and husband. One of the great things about the seminars and workshops that we produce is that much of what we do is experienced rather than just talked about. Okay, enough for the plug. Quite often, I discover that people receive the information and because they have it as simple common sense stuff that I already knew about they walk alway with a belief that it was a waste of time. Now that's a tricky thing, because many times I see people talk like they know something, when really they don't know. What they have is knowledge. What they lack is knowing.

So what's the difference between knowledge and knowing. Knowlege or knowing about something is having a third party experience whereas knowing is a first hand experience. It's the difference between the picture on the menu and the actual meal. It's the difference between being in the stands watching and playing on the field. I'll give you an example. When I was younger, and before my first encounter, I knew about kissing. I imagined what it might be like. I imagined how it might feel. I sort of knew how to do it, I thought. It's only when I actually engaged in the act did I have a knowing. I gotta tell you the experience was quite a bit different than what I thought it would be...it was SO MUCH BETTER on one level and NOT AT ALL what I thought it would be like. Anyways, I digress. Where were we...oh yeah, knowledge vs. knowing. Let me give you another example. Let's say you needed to have heart surgery, and you could choose your doctor. Not that this would actually happen, but let's say your first choice was the "doctor" who graduated at the top of her class. In fact she could recite everything she ever read on heart surgery, literally word for word like she was telling you her name. She could tell you exactly what needed to be done, the only thing is she'd never actually done a single procedure, yet. Your second choice is someone who graduated at the bottom of her class, and she could not tell you a damn thing about heart surgery. What she has though is thousands of hours of actually performing heart surgery. Now I know this is a ridiculous example, but which one would you want to operate on you? on your loved ones? anyone on the planet? I hope you would choose the latter, the one not necessarily with the knowledge, but the knowing. If you said the first one, please stop reading this post, and please stop reading anything I ever write ever again. :)

How often do we pick up knowledge, but never apply it? Why do we do this? How often do we create excuses or reasons why it doesn't make sense to start now or why it won't work? Is that true? How could you possibly know, when you haven't actually done anything with that knowledge? Perhaps, you had an experience in the past in a similar situation that has you believe that it won't work this time. Again, new time, new opportunity what if it works out different this time? Again, you got to move from knowledge to application for you to create this knowing. You have a great idea? Put it in to play. Let's see how it works in real life application. You have the worst idea on the planet? Again, put it in to play. We won't know until we go. Even when we learn from other people's experiences, we still need to take that knowledge and apply it ourselves. Someone else's knowing does not become your knowing. It becomes knowledge. You must apply that knowledge for it to become knowing.

If we allow ourselves to accumulate tons of information and do nothing with it, we might be able to sound pretty darn intelligent and entertain people at cocktail parties, but in my mind we'd just be knowledgeable idiots. On the other hand, if we put in to practice the accumulated knowledge, we'd have a knowing. People who have a knowing might not sound as intelligent, but they have conviction. Conviction from having had the experience and those people play a different kind of music when communicating than those who simply have the notes on a piece of sheet music and could tell you all about it. That's another story altogether, though. Until next time...

Live FREE!

A quick thought before lunch on a Saturday.

The seeds you sow in sight and sound make their way in to you heart. Those seeds take root and sprout what you feel in your heart. What you feel in your heart is revealed in your behaviors. The behaviors practiced over time mold and shape your character. Your character ultimately determines your destiny. Your destiny leaves a legacy and your legacy echoes in to eternity.

How loud will your legacy echo in eternity? Will you squeak as a mouse or roar as a lion? It's your life...choose wisely.

Live FREE!

Vision: Part II

The next day I went and bought a pair of goggles for myself, convinced Payton to wear his goggles one more time (this by the way took almost an hour of convincing, by this time he HATED them) got in the water with him and told him to keep his eyes open as we both went under water together. "Just look right at daddy's eyes, Payton, and I'll be looking at your eyes, okay, buddy?" And down we went, him looking at me and me looking at him. So there we were looking at each other under water and the biggest smile I'd ever seen lit up his face. He was so excited that he started to wave his hands at me and I waved back to him. After some time he popped his head out of the water, I came up and with the most excited tone I've ever heard he said, "I can see! I can see! Dad, I can see! Let's go again!" For the next fifteen minutes we just kept going under water and coming up. Finally he put his head under water and proceeded to swim to the other end of the pool, just like that!

What I discovered:
1. Habits that limit us over time become invisible, and we don't even realize that they are limiting us. The habit of closing his eyes under water was so natural, that it rendered a perfectly good tool, goggles, completely useless. Most of us have many resources or "tools" that we don't utilize, not because there's anything wrong with the tools, but simply because our limiting habits will not allow us to use them, and rather than examining ourselves, we blame the tools, the circumstances, the people around us, etc. Certainly we have physical habits that limit us, but what about the habits of thought, the limiting conversations that we have with ourselves from moment to moment. Which brings me to the next point...
2. It takes someone outside of ourselves to point out things that we could never figure out ourselves or would take a lot longer to figure out ourselves. Coaching is important! The truth for all of us is that we all have a blind spot. Physically we have a blind spot, but more importantly when it comes to looking at ourselves we have a blind spot. This is why it is so important that we surround ourselves with people who are willing to be honest with us. Then trust these people, not because they're always right, but because they have a perspective that we do not have. They act like mirrors for us, without the mirrors we could never see ourselves. Having said that since we act as mirrors for each other, let's work dilligently on being accurate mirrors, clear and free of distortion. And finally...
3. Vision gives direction, direction gives purpose, purpose gives activity power and power creates movement towards the vision. What astounded me more than anything was how effective and efficient my son became just by having vision under water. Of course we've worked on his skill since then, and he can actually swim without the aid of a floaty vest. At the time, though, I remember just watching him finally move around the pool rather than splashing water everywhere and going nowhere and thinking how important vision is, not just in swimming but in life.

To sum up, perhaps you find yourself "splashing around and getting nowhere" in the pool called life. Could you become more skilled at what you do? Certainly you can, we all can become better at what we DO. However, consider the possibility that improving your skill without vision would still have you be stuck and going nowhere, you'll just be better at it. :) And perhaps the most important thing you could do for yourself in this moment is to simply OPEN YOUR EYES (of your heart and soul), SEE where it is you want to go and let that be your guide. Until next time...

Live FREE,

Vision: Part I

How important is vision? Well, according to scripture, where there is no vision the people perish. I tend to agree with this. After all I've met plenty of good-hearted and intelligent people who have no goals or a vision for their lives, and quite frankly they just flounder and are absolutely aimless. How do you explain all of these people on weekends (sometimes even on weekdays) who choose to spend hundreds of dollars getting drunk? For what big purpose do they engage in this behavior? Don't get me wrong, I've been there myself. What I remember about those days was that I had no other purpose than to get to the next day. It seems to me that without a clear and definite aim in life almost any behavior will do. I had an interesting experience a few summers ago that I think illustrates the importance of vision, that I'd like to share with you. I think you'll enjoy this one.

My son Payton was four years old at the time, and absolutely loved getting in the pool. LOVED IT! Still does. Back when he was four we were living in a house that had a pool in the backyard and we'd pretty much get in the pool every day. Fortunately I was working out of the house, and I could get away with doing this. Grace our second child was not yet one, and my wife Jinhee would watch Grace while I took Payton in the pool. We decided to get him one of these vests to help him float, and he'd do his best to do what he saw daddy do. After a while he got used to sticking his head under water and splashing around just moving his arms and legs like crazy. Unfortunately for the amount of effort he was exerting he wasn't going very far. In fact he wasn't going anywhere. My wife who used to teach swimming when she was in high school got in the water with him on ocassion and tried to teach him as well, but nothing seemed to be working. One day Jinhee said he needs to open his eyes under water. She remembered that when the kids could see under water, the VISION gave their action direction. Unfortunately Payton had developed the habit of closing his eyes every time he put his head under water, and we could not get him to open his eyes. So we came up with a solution - you guessed it - goggles!

The next time we went in the pool, the goggles went on and he started to swim all around that pool...well not exactly. I put the goggles on him, he stuck his head in the water, and absolutely no difference. Same massive action and zero movement. All kinds of thoughts went through my head. What's wrong with him? Why can't he swim? Maybe swimming is not his thing? I'm a bad coach. Should we invest in some swim lessons, after all I'm not really qualified to teach swimming. I just kept putting the goggles on him, and he'd complain that it was tight on his face, it was puling on his hair, it was uncomfortable, etc. Bottom line was that within a week, he didn't like the goggles and he'd rather not get in the pool then put them on. I was stumped! Which was quite a blow to my ego - the coach! This went on for about two weeks when it finally dawned on me that he might be closing his eyes under water while he was wearing the goggles!!! EUREKA!!!

To Be Continued...

Live FREE,

Bondage & Slavery in the Modern Economy

Many people I run into complain about feeling trapped. Trapped in their dead-end job, marriage, business,lack of education, lack of resources, etc. Most of these people when I ask them what they would need to feel free or experience a level of freedom will inevitably talk about something outside of themselves as the source of their experience. If they only had good credit, the right job, the right spouse, children who listened and obeyed, own house rather than renting, car, etc.

Certainly it seems that on the surface these things do make sense, after all the thought process is something like "I don't have enough money, therefore if I have enough money then I'll be free." There is nothing wrong with having money, degrees or the title at work. All of these things are worthwhile pursuits in life. The real issue for most people are that they are enslaved and trapped by the idea that these things outside of themselves will provide them with a sense of freedom. It seems to me, though, that by the time you accumulate the things that you thought would provide you with a feeling of being free that thought has enslaved you to that thing.

How would you know if you are in bondage like this? Imagine what life would be like without that thing. Name it. What would you experience if you lost your title, your job, your car, your spouse, your house, children? Really ask yourself, have you put your sense of security in these things outside of you? Even religion! If your sense of security is dependent on these things, then I'd say that you are in bondage or enslaved by them. These things provide you with some false sense of security.

I've been working on my message for some time now, and haven't been able to figure it out until tonight. I certainly want people to live inspired lives, but it occured to me that unless people are free - mentally, emotionally, spiritually, physically - they have a difficult time being inspired. So many people are trapped in going to jobs they don't like just so they can pay the bills on time to keep up their good credit and keep the things - they are in bondage to the system, this perpetual cycle. I want you to be FREE! My goal for you is FREEDOM! How would you like that?

To your FREEDOM,